If you’ve ever found yourself staring at the ceiling wondering how to start praying — or if you’re praying “the right way” — you’re not alone. Many women feel unsure about prayer, especially when no one has ever taught them what it can actually look like in day-to-day life. That’s why I’m sharing how to pray using the P.R.A.Y. method: a simple, powerful, and grace-filled way to organize your prayers and connect with God. Whether you’re just starting out or looking to reignite your prayer life, this method gives you a rhythm to follow and a foundation to build from.

Introduction: Why I Needed a Simple Way to Pray

I’ve been going to church my whole life. I’ve sung the songs, said the meal blessings, and listened to countless sermons. But for years, no one ever really broke down prayer in a way I could understand and apply to my own life.

Growing up, prayer was something we did in the car before long trips or over a plate of food. I heard people say, “praise God” or “give it to the Lord,” but no one explained how to actually do that in everyday life.

I thought repentance meant listing out every single sin I could remember. Like: “I’m sorry I lied to my dad about curfew when I was nineteen” or “I’m sorry I was gossiping about their situation.” I didn’t realize repentance was less about reporting and more about turning away from the sins I kept falling into.

I believed it was selfish to ask God for things I wanted. I assumed I should only pray for the needs of others and not my own desires.

And as for yielding? I didn’t even know that was part of prayer. Sitting in silence and listening felt like something reserved for monks or yogis — not Christian moms trying to hear from God.

Even when I was in leadership at church, I struggled with personal prayer. Oddly enough, I felt more confident praying aloud in front of others than I did in my own quiet time.

It wasn’t until I was pregnant with my daughter, Bella, in 2019 that I began to learn about spiritual warfare and prayer strategy. That season opened my eyes. But honestly? What really made it all click was learning how to pray using the P.R.A.Y. method.

Let me show you how it works.

How to Pray Using the P.R.A.Y. Method

P – Praise

Start your prayer by expressing your excitement to be with God. You don’t just walk up to family or friends and immediately ask for things, then turn and walk away — that would be rude. No, we greet them warmly, maybe with a hug, and begin a real conversation.

You should be excited to talk to Him. He’s God, after all. This part of prayer should reflect that joy. Like when you run into a best friend or your child wraps their arms around you at the end of the day — that’s the energy we should bring to prayer.

Praise is our way of saying, “God, I’m so glad to be with You. I love who You are.”

It’s also where we say thank you — not just for recent blessings, but for everything. Everything we have is because of Him: our family, our homes, our strength, our world. Take a moment to reflect on the good in your life and give thanks.

Excitement and joy shouldn’t only be for moments when your spouse surprises you with the perfect gift. That heartfelt, joyful response? That’s the kind of love we should bring to our Creator for all of the things He has given us daily.

Opening your prayer with praise can change everything about how you approach God. It sets your heart in the right place and reminds you of His goodness.

And yes, it might feel strange to feel excitement toward someone you can’t see or touch. But God is just as real as the people you love most. He is active in your life — whether that was through Jesus on the cross 2,000 years ago or in how He got your daughter home safely yesterday. He is always working for your good.

And when praising God feels nearly impossible — when you’re angry or too heartbroken to breathe — know this: He understands. And that’s when you need to turn to Him the most.

“Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise; give thanks to Him and praise His name.” – Psalm 100:4 (NIV)

R – Repent

This is not about confessing every little sin from years ago. It’s about taking responsibility for the patterns you struggle with — the habits that consistently pull you away from God. Sin often looks more like a cycle than a one-time event. Maybe it’s the way you speak harshly when you’re frustrated or how you fall into jealousy scrolling social media. Maybe it’s people-pleasing, bitterness, or an addiction to comfort and control.

Repentance is the intentional act of naming these patterns before Jesus and saying, “I don’t want to live like this anymore. Help me turn the other way.” It’s not shame-based — it’s soul-freeing.

Think of it like recovery. In addiction therapy, people often have a sponsor — someone who keeps them accountable. Jesus is our sponsor. He knows temptation. He walked among sinners and loved them anyway. When you repent, you’re not groveling — you’re checking in with someone who genuinely wants to see you free. You’re asking Him to walk with you and help you choose differently tomorrow.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” – 1 John 1:9 (NIV)

A – Ask

This is the part of prayer we’re usually most familiar with — asking. Whether you’ve seen a car accident and are praying for the injured, or you need a financial miracle, asking comes naturally.

We ask for healing, for help, for hope.

God wants you to ask. Not just for needs — but even for the things you want. A godly husband. A new home. A breakthrough in your career. He loves giving good gifts to His children.

Sometimes God answers right away. Other times, He asks us to wait. And sometimes He gives us something better than what we asked for — because He sees the whole picture. Maybe you’re praying for a husband, but God is still preparing him. Maybe the house He has for you just isn’t ready yet.

And if you’ve been taught, like I was, that wanting something someone else has is automatically coveting and sinful — let me lovingly clarify. Yes, coveting is a sin. But dreaming isn’t. And neither is asking for something good and godly just because you’ve seen others enjoy it.

For example, I’ve longed for a house with a yard, no HOA, where we can take full accountability for our home and raise chickens. Before Bella was born, my husband and I used to drive for Uber and Lyft, and I’d find myself taking rides out into Loxahatchee — a rural area where small-scale farming is allowed. I never obsessed over any specific house, but I just loved the idea of living that way. Some friends and family moved out there, and while I tried not to let it turn into jealousy, I still hesitated to ask God for it — because I was taught that it was selfish.

But here’s the truth: God gives us the desires of our hearts when our hearts are aligned with Him. He places dreams in us. And it’s okay — even good — to bring those dreams to Him. He cares about them because He cares about you.

If you’re unsure whether your asking is coming from a place of contentment or coveting, simply ask God to check your heart. Invite Him to correct your motives if they’re off. He will — and He’ll do it gently.

Ask boldly. Ask with trust. And ask while listening — because the answer might involve obedience or waiting.

A Quick Tip: Each time you pray, lift up someone’s salvation. It doesn’t have to be everyone every time. But think of one person — someone you know personally or even from afar. Pray that they come to know Jesus personally, because salvation isn’t just knowing about God, it’s having a relationship with Christ. Your prayers could change someone’s eternity.

“You do not have because you do not ask God.” – James 4:2 (NIV)

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” – Matthew 7:7 (NIV)

Y – Yield

This is the exhale at the end of your prayer. Yielding is surrender. It’s where you say, “God, I trust You. I release this into Your hands.”

It’s also a time to sit in silence. To reflect on God’s promises. To rest in His love. Prayer is a conversation — not a monologue — and yielding gives space for God to speak.

Picture sitting with God on a quiet porch. You’ve said all you needed to say, and now you’re just with Him. No more talking. Just trusting.

As you grow in prayer, you’ll begin to recognize His voice. Often, the Holy Spirit speaks through what feels like a sudden thought, a flash of clarity, or a sense of peace. Maybe it’s an idea to take a bold step. Or a sense that you’re right where you need to be.

But the enemy speaks too — with fear, doubt, and discouragement. That’s why it’s so important to yield. To tune out the noise and be still long enough to hear what’s true.

Even if you’re not sure what to listen for yet, start by yielding with scripture. Read a promise aloud. Rest in it. Let God’s Word be the final word in your prayer.

“Be still, and know that I am God.” – Psalm 46:10 (NIV)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” – Proverbs 3:5 (NIV)

Sample Prayer Using the P.R.A.Y. Method

If you’re still not sure how to start, here’s a simple example you can pray right now. You don’t have to use these exact words — but let this guide your heart as you begin.

Praise:

Lord, You are so good and faithful. Thank You for waking me up this morning, for my family, and for Your presence in my life. You are my peace, my provider, and my protector.

Repent:

Father, I confess that I’ve been impatient and critical lately. I’ve let worry steal my joy and fear guide my choices. Please forgive me. Help me turn away from these habits and walk in Your truth today.

Ask:

I ask for strength to get through today, peace in my home, and provision for our finances. I lift up my loved ones who don’t know You — draw them close. I pray for wisdom and clarity as I make decisions this week.

Yield:

I surrender all of this to You, God. I trust Your plan, even when I don’t understand it. I rest in Your love and wait expectantly to hear from You. Speak, Lord — I’m listening. Amen.

Want to Go Deeper?

This prayer structure became the heart behind my upcoming resource, Simply Shielded. It’s a prayer system designed for women like you — women who want to organize their prayers, connect deeply with God’s Word, and fight their battles in faith. Stay tuned for more — or join the Shielded Society to be first in line when it launches.

You don’t have to pray perfectly. You just have to pray sincerely.

Start with P.R.A.Y.

With love, 

Sarah